First Belly Shot

This was taken at 10 weeks 2 days. Though my belly has popped out quite alot over the last week, this is also what I look like after Christmas lunch with all the trimmings. Well, maybe not quite. I'm feeling quite alot of pulling, pinching and tugging these days - probably indicates all sorts of stretching going on. By this Thursday at 11 weeks the babies will be the size of limes.

Next week we have our ultrasound with my regular OB but we've also been booked in for our first trimester screen on the 25th at exactly 12 weeks. This will be done at the perinatologist's office. It's the nuchal translucency ultrasound and bloodwork that goes with it. I'm looking forward to meeting with the peri (high risk OB) and already have a long list of questions......

In terms of the sickness, I had a really good weekend with a long stretch of no nausea or vomiting and was even able to leave the house a couple of times for a few hours. It was good to be out and about again. Today I'm not feeling quite as good, but still better than I have been. Perhaps dropping the estrogen tablets and the progesterone shot is helping, coupled with moving swiftly towards the second trimester.

10 Weeks

We're at 10 weeks today and counting down to the second trimester. For one, I sincerely hope I will start feeling better soon. The "morning" sickness is ruling my world at the moment. Lately I've seen pockets of improvement for some hours here and there, but it's still very unpredictable and overwhelming. I've also been feeling slightly feverish, clammy and am getting some pretty nasty stomach aches, whether I eat or not. I wonder whether the clamminess and feverish feeling is a touch of dehydration. In terms of the stomach aches, those Tums are always by my side (they're allowed of course). Having said all that, I wouldn't want to miss any of it, if this is what it takes to get to our babies in December. It's a long stretch between our last ultrasound and the next one on the 23rd but I think everything is ok. I have no reason at all to believe otherwise and my belly seems to suggest there's some serious growth going on. It's popped out quite a bit in the last week.

The best news of the week is that our last PIO (progesterone in oil) shot is tomorrow! My progesterone jumped from 36 last week to 55 this week, despite my going down to half the dose. So I go cold turkey tomorrow, which is a bit scary but also excellent - those daily IM shots are not for the faint of heart. I take my last estrace tablet on Saturday and then I'm down to just one estrogen patch for support. I asked whether I could get rid of the tablet next rather than the last patch, since I have a suspicion that the tablet is contributing to my sickness. Even if I'm wrong, taking any tablet is difficult with the mother of all gag reflexes hounding me. I'll be glad to get rid of it. Talking of gagging, our poor dog and two cats are very confused and worried. They all meet outside the bathroom door and exchange concerned looks whenever I'm in there.

I want to finish by congratulating my girl Sue for her positive betas. I'm really happy for you. Another great CCRM success.

Little Chicks

We had our second ultrasound today and everything is looking perfect! Both little beans are measuring right on time, at 8w5d. The heartbeats are 171 and 182 bpm, which is normal for their age. My OB told us that this appointment was a huge milestone and he is very confident, now that he's seen great growth since the last ultrasound two weeks ago. According to him, we're not totally out of the woods, but "standing on the edge of the woods looking out". Great news! Perhaps it will all start really sinking in soon.....

My sickness hasn't got any better yet. I weigh 7lbs less that I did when I got pregnant, which obviously means I've got more to make up. I'm supposed to gain 25lbs before week 20, plus the 7lbs I've lost. Hmmm, that will be a challenge. Isn't it ironic that the one time you're supposed to put on weight you can't stand the sight of food? We're going to add fruit smoothies with protein powder so that I'm getting the necessary amount of protein. I think I'll be able to stomach those.

I'm down to two estrogen patches and a progesterone shot every other day now. My progesterone has dropped to 36 (from 52) but it's still well above the minimum rate of 20 so I think I'll be allowed to stay on the dose I'm on now. I'm waiting for the official word back from Denver about that. My estrogen number wasn't in yet but will be back today as well.

Our next appointment is on June 23rd, just shy of 12 weeks.

Rocky Mountain High

It's twins!!!! They're measuring within a day of eachother and have nice strong heartbeats of 128 and 127 beats per minute (bpm).

The ultrasound tech could tell how nervous we were and she scarcely had the dildo cam in before she said "It's two!". Thank goodness she came out with it so fast, my heart was about to jump out of my chest. Then we saw the little flutters of their hearts - you don't hear the heartbeat at this early stage, but you can see a little flicker on the ultrasound. It's utterly amazing.

We met with the doctor afterwards, but I admit that I didn't really take in much of what he was saying. We did take home a big information pack. My next ultrasound is in two weeks' time. I'm glad we can have one so soon. I think he'll let me have ultrasounds whenever I want them.....

I continue to feel sick as a dog but I'll take it all on the chin.

Feeling Sick

There's nothing much to report this week, other than that my hormone levels have gone up. My E2 rebounded from the drop last week, back up to 737 on Monday and my P4was up to 74.4. Since it was steady at around 59 for a couple of weeks and we made no change in the doses, this could mean that the placenta has started to kick in with its own hormone regulation. I have another hormone check next Tuesday at the same time as the ultrasound and then the weaning starts.

I've started feeling more and more nauseous since Sunday. I suspect this is the infamous "morning sickness" which is supposed to start at about 6 weeks: I'm at 6 weeks today. Mine obviously started a bit earlier, at 5w3d. It seems to be getting worse now, lasting almost all day. I can barely take my supplements or eat anything, but once I do eat, I feel better for a little while. Once again, I'm very happy I work from home and am not having to travel at the moment. I can't imagine feeling like this on the road or in the office.

I have all the common symptoms: sore boobs, some minor cramping here and there, a stronger sense of smell, fatigue and really strange, vivid dreams. The one last night was about former President Bill Clinton cleaning our kitchen floor. I won't even attempt to interpret that one......

We're excited and terrified in equal measures about Tuesday's ultrasound; it can't get here soon enough.

Numbers

I had more blood tests on Wednesday. Everything's still looking good, however my E2 (estrogen) levels did drop from 867 to 324. They want them above 300, but because it's close I'm adding a tablet a day (Estrace) to my tummy patches. My P4 was perfect at 58.2 (59 last week). They didn't seem worried about my drop in E2 and even left it up to me to add the tablet, which I will, just to make me feel more confident. Apparently the levels can fluctuate depending on when you change the patches. I'd just done the 48-hour-patch-change-around an hour before my blood was taken so perhaps that was it. I sneakily added a third beta (pregnancy hormone check) to my other blood tests, just for reassurance. It was 3980 and doubling time is 38 hours, still well ahead of the necessary 48 hours. Here it is graphed out:



We're still very nervous and hesitant to get excited. Perhaps after the ultrasound it will all seem more real, but for now we're holding on for dear life.

It's amazing how much of a numbers game this really is. With both CCRM cycles combined, these are the numbers that finally got us to this, albeit early, point.

Eggs Retrieved: 41
Eggs Mature: 30
Eggs Fertilised: 22
Embryos Successfully Developed to Blastocysts and Biopsied: 7
Embryos Normal: 2 (1 per cycle)

It seems like we scraped through by the seat of our pants. It took forty-one eggs to get just two normal embryos.

The five abnormal embryos all had mistakes on just one chromosome each:

Embryo 1. 47 chromosomes, an additional 12th chromosome
Embryo 2. 47 chromosomes, an additional 13th chromosome
Embryo 3. 45 chromosomes, only one 19th chromosome
Embryo 4. 45 chromosomes, only one 22nd chromosome
Embryo 5. 47 chromosomes, an additional 22nd chromosome

In all likelihood none of these embryos would have implanted at all, but if they had, it would have lead to a miscarriage. Interestingly, most of these five abnormal embryos were graded more highly than the two normal ones. Had we not tested, we would have transferred by embryo grade and it wouldn't have worked until we transferred the lower grades, ie the normal ones.

The questions still remain over the failure of our previous local cycle. We had seven blastocysts from that one cycle. If we had two normals in seven blasts in Denver, surely we had some normals in seven blasts from the local cycle, too? We know that three of the seven were lost during the fresh transfer, due to trauma (dilation of the cervix, spasms). But were all the normal ones in that batch? The remaining four were transferred from frozen. Judging by the beta numbers from the frozen cycle, one implanted but then didn't make it over 100 beta points. The pregnancy was lost at 5w2d. Knowing what we know now, these are the possible reasons:

1. The normals really were in the fresh batch of three that were lost for mechanical reasons.

2. Transferring normals with abnormals somehow compromised implantation of the normal embryos.

3. My Protein S deficiency, which causes blood clotting, compromised successful implantation.

4. There were no normals in the local cycle (hard to believe).

Obviously we will never know for sure and now we're firmly looking forward, not back. However, we've learnt a great deal from our trials and tribulations, which has undoubtedly helped us get this far.

I want to finish this entry by acknowledging that many of my blog friends and real life friends aren't where we are yet and I'm rooting for all of you. Mother's Day is a particularly hard day for everyone who's going through infertility and I'm sending strong thoughts of support to you. Please let this be the last bad year for all of us.

Beta # 2 Is In

Without further ado, it's 439. 439. Wow. That's a doubling time of 37 hours, nicely ahead of the appropriate 48 hour doubling time. Here are our values graphed onto averages for a singleton pregnancy. Hmmm.



We're extremely encouraged and starting to get at least somewhat excited at this point. So many more hurdles to jump over, but so far so fabulous.

We've already had a small "emergency" call from the clinic in Denver. They called back on Wednesday late afternoon and of course I thought they were calling to tell me there'd been a dreadful mistake and they'd given me someone else's numbers, mine were negative, terribly sorry and so on......... It all still seems too good to be true, hence my apprehension. However, the call was in fact made to tell me I had to get a shot of Rhogam Immune Globulin within 72 hours of my bleed on Tuesday night. My blood type is O negative, so my blood must not mix with that of the fetus (it's not actually a fetus yet, still an embryo), so they wanted to take the necessary precautions and give me this protective shot. I went to my OB/GYN for it.

The next big milestone will be the ultrasound in two and a half weeks, where they'll be looking for a heartbeat. It'll be on May 18th or 19th. In the meantime, I'll need to go in for estrogen and progesterone checks to make sure the levels are good, as well as CBCs (complete blood counts) to check my blood platelets since I'm taking a Heparin derivative (Lovenox) for my blood disorder. I'll need my platelets checked once a month from now on.

So it's sparkly for us tonight. Mine's a sparkly water, but I might be so decadent as to have a slice of lemon in it.